WAG

So, I have a serious addiction: "Will and Grace" reruns. I (and now John) have seen each episode at least five times. I try and watch it every night before bed, but sometimes John high-jacks the remote and puts his foot down which I totally understand. This unbreakable habit is out of control. I find myself quoting it at really inappropriate or uncomfortable times. Usually no one knows what I'm talking about (unless you're John or Susan), but it doesn't stop me. I just and look and sounds like a complete freak show which is fine too, I guess. Also, John used to think that I was originally funny like on my own accord without inspiration from the fab four, until he sees an episode that I'm quoting or gesturing from. I think it is disappointing to him to know that I'm a copy cat, but seriously this stuff can't be beat.

Karen: Good Lord. I can't believe I'm at a public pool. Why doesn't somebody just pee directly on me? 

Cheryl: Mrs. Walker? Cheryl Bricker-Fossberg, Taylor and Hayden's mom.
Karen: I have no idea what you just said. 

[while watching basketball on TV]
Grace: Have you seen Matt yet?
Will: Yeah, he's right there, right on the sidelines. Just four clicks left of Spike Lee. Just right beside that little girl and her grandpa.
Jack: Uh, that's Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas.

[Ellen asked Grace to baby-sit her kids but is now upset because she assumed Will would be there as well and he is out of town and she no longer wants Grace to do it]
Ellen: You know what I just realized? Rob's sister can probably do it. She lives closer to us anyway.
Grace: Judy? The one who has to turn the lights on 14 times or the oceans will dry up?
Karen: Ellen, why would you leave your kids with someone who has such an important job? 

Cheryl: I think you are awful.
Karen: Oh yeah? Well I think stretch pants are awful, but I am too much of a lady to say it, FAT ASS.
[to Jack]
Karen: Could you believe that?
[scoffs]
Karen: Some people, so tactless. 

Karen: Oh honey, I would, but... I don't want to. 

[at Karen and Lyle's wedding] 

Jennifer Lopez: Congratulations to Karen and Lyle. I just want to say that the secret to a happy marriage is... oh, who am I kidding? 

Grace: Are you wearing smarty-pants, because that was a great idea!
Jack: Well, no, but I might be wearing a witty thong! 

Karen: Grace. It's Christmas, for goodness sake. Think about the baby Jesus: up in that tower, letting his hair down... so that the three wise men can climb up and spin the dradel and see if there are six more weeks of winter. 

Jack: Are there any Hobbits left in America?